A Needle in a Haystack

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.   See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23-24, NIV)

A few minutes ago, I got back from the hospital. My youngest daughter had a sewing needle removed from her foot. Though it threatened her joint with infection, she couldn't remember having stepped on it. At first, that seemed impossible to me, but then I thought about all the sharp little things that pierce me through every day, sometimes until I'm numb; things that God Himself has to remove.

We found the needle by divine accident. Baby Girl and Oldest Boy were trying to work out (long story) and he dropped a weight on her foot. ("She might die! You really need to take her to the hospital, Mom. Trust me." Right...).

After a rush to the nearest walk-in, the astonished doctor reported all toes in tact and everything fine...except for the sewing needle broken in two inside her foot!

Yowza.

Today, as I sat waiting for the surgery to be over, as I sit now watching my daughter sleep, I ask God give me a spiritual x-ray and find all the broken, buried things in me. I don't think I want to see exactly, for in some ways, I know already, feeling the hurts turn and bend each day. In truth, He knows already where everything is located, how long it has been there and just what it will take to remove it. The question is, am I willing to be still for the surgery.

Not so much. Just being honest. But I'm trying. I'm really trying. Trying and trusting in mercy, growing in grace. Hoping for healing. That's all any of us can do.

As for my daughter, her only concern (after her pre-operative cabbage patch dance induced by the anesthesia) was that the drug in question wasn't legal for everyday use. ("This stuff could really mess somebody up!" she said giggling on her way to unconsciousness).

What a day.

Father God,

Heal the things that have pierced my heart. Turn me gently to see the unseen remnants of the world, threatening beneath my skin. Help me to be still and open-hearted, waiting for You to come and do a work in me. Thank you for the gift of salvation that wiped away my sins, the transfusion of blood that makes us able to come before you.

In Jesus' name,
Amen

  

Marilynn Griffith is a wife to a deacon, mom to a tribe and the author of eight novels. Her upcoming Rhythms of Grace (Revell, August 2008) looks at race and faith through the eyes of a group of friends tied together by the beat of a drum and an old woman’s words. Visit her at www.MarilynnGriffith.com .

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Comments

[MJ]

Wow.